Nexterday News

Beijing, China (NDNS) — Last night in a solemn address from the Oval Office the President announced the complete annexation of Hawaii by the Democratic People’s Republic of China. This comes as the interest on US loans from China has been expected to equal the total US budget by the year 2032. In exchange for the Hawaiian Archipelago China has forgiven over a trillion dollars of debt owed to the Communist state. Also, this move gives China strategic dominance of the majority of the Pacific and a great tourist destination. Given this, the US still owes over two trillion dollars of debt to the Chinese government but also dramatically lowers the amount of interest that has to be paid.

Republican leaders in congress have voiced strong opposition to this move saying that the Democrats are to blame for all of their wasteful spending on things such as health care, education, and a programs to help ween the United States off of foreign sources of energy. Democrats charged back saying that these large debts are largely because of tax-cuts in the early part of the 21st century and a twenty year war in Iraq.

In response to that the Republican majority leader simply stated, “(Expletive Deleted) you.”

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