Nexterday News

Hollywood, CA (NDNS) — It’s September, and you know what that means?  New TV shows that will be off the air within several episodes!  And, some that become huge hits and part of our national zeitgeist.  But, who am I kidding?  These new shows are going to suck!

The Bionic She-Man (NBC):  After the miserable failure of The Bionic Woman two Septembers ago, it truly came as a shock to me that the Peacock network would honestly try to rework this show.  Instead of being a woman with bionic implants, the protagonist is a Bionic Tranny trying to escape from the evil clutches of the “first Bionic Tranny.”I have a feeling that viewers will have an easy time escaping from this “Bionic Disaster.”  Off-the-air by the end of the season.

Eat (ABC):  This new reality show features the exploits of many of the world’s better known competitive eaters.   Each show will end with a “Feat of Eat” where the world’s “best” square off in a battle of an un-square meal.  I anticipate that anyone who watches this will immediately go on a diet or get gastro-bypass.  Off-the-air just after Thanksgiving.

CSI:  Green Bay (CBS):  For the past ten years the Tiffany network has been regurgitating CSI clones at us faster then Nicole Richie after an all you can eat buffet.  Now comes the “Arc de defeat” a CSI taking place in “crime capitol” Green Bay, Wisconsin.  Hey, CBS!  The only crime being committed in Green Bay happens once a year when the Packers “murder” the Lions in football.  You should investigate that!  Off-the-air by Halloween.

Todd (CW):  This is a show about a quirky guy named Todd who lives with his parents;  but, his parents were recruited by the CIA to spy on hippies, but the hippies killed his parents, now the CIA is making Todd spy on the hippies, but he likes the hippies, so he joins their side, in the process is recruited by the Devil to irradicate evil and make pop-culture references.  I’m not going to make a snide comment about the show; the show makes fun of itself.  But unlike other shows that “make fun of themselves,” this show doesn’t know it.  Off-the-air by who knows?  It’s the CW, it’s not like they’re making anything better then this!

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